Glass GazetteSatire

Film bro? This woman knows what year the Matrix was released.

By December 15, 2021 December 18th, 2021 No Comments

Woman leaning against neon light

Go off, I guess.

An exciting story to come out of QUT, Kelvin Grove, 22 year-old music major Melissa Creasy has finally accrued enough bro points to become a full blown film bro.

Sources close to the story say the self-proclaimed girlboss was having an argument with her friend about Keanu Reeves when she pulled out her phone to prove she was correct about what year The Matrix was released.

“It’s 1999,” Melissa said to reporters.

“Tilly was saying that it came out in the early 2000s because her brother saw it in theatres.

“So I called her a stupid bitch and checked my phone to prove my point.

“So, I guess she was a stupid bitch after all.”

When approached for comment, Melissa’s best friend Tilly Swan was reluctant, before whispering, “she’s so mean,” under her breath and wiping away a single tear.

The Gazette understands that Melissa, who’s favourite film is Ice Age 3: Dawn of the Dinosaurs, will now be contesting the role of President at the next QUT Film Club AGM.

“It’s a glass ceiling, and I need to break it,” she said.

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